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The Business of Blogging

Comments: 11

Just 403 shares left of Antipixel on BlogShares. Get ‘em while you can. We’ve got big things planned around here, shareholders! Aggressive union busting, Enron-style accounting, we’re moving all production to China, and tough austerity measures are being implemented (I’ll be panelling the auxillary jacuzzis in Japanese cypress rather than mahogany). Plus our campaign contributions have ensured us a voice on Vice-President Cheney’s blog task force, so when California-style commentary shortages send rolling idea brownouts across the web, you can rest easy knowing we have a hand on the tiller.

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Posted to MetaStuff • 2003.04.06 (Sun) • 11:09

Comments

Posted by lil 2003.04.06, 14:01

Looks like you’re hot property, Jeremy! Three hours after you posted this, your blog only has 22 shares left on offer. Now if only I could get my own shares to appreciate in value from merely $0.01 each ;-)

Posted by jh 2003.04.06, 14:46

We categorically deny any rumours of impropriety and are as mystified by the recent attention of the SEC as anyone. In fact, we will not even dignify these rumours with a response, so forget we said anything.

Also, we will find the Gulfstream. Jets costing in the millions of dollars just don’t go missing, do they? We’re pretty sure we left it parked beside the UPS terminal, but it must be around here somewhere. Our CFO probably knows, and we will be asking him as soon as we can locate him.

Posted by eric 2003.04.06, 15:51

Is Antipixel part of the war machine? I’m looking for blogs that are in line for rich government contracts.

Posted by nick 2003.04.06, 16:51

heh, “brownouts.”

Posted by Jesper 2003.04.06, 19:56

I bought another four. :)

Posted by Mary Beth 2003.04.07, 07:31

You’re done. I just squeeked in. Phew. Another world crisis averted!

Posted by jh 2003.04.07, 17:57

Eric —- Don’t you worry. We’re going to be making a killing — oops! ha ha, I mean a packet —- from this war.

As a leading producer of military-grade theatrical makeup and prosthetic brows (we make two kinds; mild concern with a hint of nonchalance and a deeply furrowed, heartfelt concern model for the top brass —- we tried to make a Presidential model but the required angles are pretty steep and the brows kept sliding off towards the sides of the face), Antipixel understands that the modern nation-builder needs to look good as he stands before the world media, summarily ignoring their questions.

With all eyes on the conquering heroes, they need to look their best. That’s why they use Antipixel brand makeup and prosthetic brows —- we’re the front lines in the war on inquisitiveness! Our Operation Enduring Confidence range of products stands up to even the toughest grilling.

Big names depend on us, Eric —- Franks, Meyers, Wolfowitz, Powell, Ashcroft. I’ll let you in on a little secret: we’ve been taking care of Rummy for ages, too. It wasn’t easy getting that squint to stick, but our chemists came up with a triple-strength botox that we inject right into the brow of his nose and it just screws that gorgeous mug of his right up. Concern, steadfastness and resolve —- all in a little 30ml vial! He buys ‘em buy the gross.

With media appearances set to skyrocket in the near future —- and an awful lot of explaining to do —- a little bird told us (alright, it was Fleischer!) that we’re in line for a lot of that action. Of course, this is strictly between you and me, Eric. Discretion is the better part of valour in the military-grade theatrical makeup business. But now you know what you have to do: buy that stock, Eric. Buy! Buy! Buy!

Posted by Jesper 2003.04.08, 07:30